Nov 12-18 Discussion #3

I found the Family Life Cycle very interesting as I have never heard of it before. There are seven stages of the cycle including : establishing a family, enlarging a family, developing a family, encouraging independence, launching children, postlaunching of children, and retirement. It’s fascinating because having a family is one of my life long dreams. Thinking about a future family in terms of the stages is overwhelming but very exciting as well. I have always had established family goals that I thought I would do by a certain age. Since I have started my career I have realized that not everything begins or can end when we predict them too. I have met many parents and married couples that also thought they would have children or get married by a certain age but it rarely happens as planned. I now have the outlook of going with the flow of life’s unexpected events and hoping for the best.  

November 11-18 Discussion #2

It is very hard to say or predict the next 50 years as there are so many variables that cause change. For the most part I think there will be a big half that wants “a vital marriage” and others who will take the route of having a committed relationship but not wanting to get married. A vital marriage is when a couple is close emotionally and want to be together physically as much as possible (Wood 308). The other half would want to be in some type of committed relationship but not get married because they don’t see the point. I have met a lot of people my age that do not see the importance in marriage. It is solely a piece of paper is their mentality. I might have a realistic prediction and a hope for the next 50 years. My hope is that my generation, those who are up next in a sense to start careers and get married really take it seriously and find the beauty in marriage. I hope that those who take part in marriage remember that it is forever because if they do we might be able to get the 50% divorce rate down.

 

November 12-18 Discussion #1

Family can be any group of people that love and care about each other despite race, age, or gender. The typical family would be two parents (a male and female married couple) with kids and any other immediate blood related relative. Although this is the “norm”, I think that a family can consist of any person blood related or not. Families can be extended, dysfunctional, diverse, and still be as valuable as any other families. Family members typically care for each other and have the mentality of “I will be here for you no matter what”. Families have bonds that differentiate from just friendship type relationships or even romantic relationships. Quite honestly, every type of family fits into my definition including; gay couples who have adopted children, single mothers or fathers, men or women remarried, children free families, family members (aunts/uncles/friends) who have been chosen to look after children, and heterosexual couples with children etc. I have a very open and accepting view about relationships especially families because I come from an interracial, divorced, and remarried household. For this reason I am a big advocate that being different than the norm is okay. 

Nov 5 - Nov 11 Discussion #3

Committed romantic relationships involve three components including commitment, passion, and intimacy. Passion describes intensely positive feelings and fervent desire for another person (Wood 277). Passion is not necessarily sexual feelings within a relationship. It includes an emotional, spiritual, and intellectual interaction. Commitment is the intention to remain involved with a relationship (Wood 278). Commitment is the decision one makes to stay in a relationship with another despite the hardships they may endure. Intimacy is feelings of closeness, connection, and tenderness (Wood 279). Intimacy reflects affection and displays feeling of caring and love. These dimensions are all present and only strengthen any committed romance. These components are interconnected and when love occurs these all seem to happen naturally. These are overwhelming feelings that are often overlooked but they are important for long lasting relationships, especially marriage. I take marriage very seriously and truly believe that once you commit to someone you have to make it work no matter what obstacles may stand in your way. 

Nov 5th - 11th Discussion #2

I have experienced a relationship in which commitment was present but love was not necessarily. I dated a guy back in high school and although many say you really can’t know what love is at that age, of course we thought we did. I was very immature and realized now that what we had was commitment but lacked a sense of true love. I can remember us being together all the time and trusting one another. Although we were young we had a committed relationship in the sense that we were dedicated to each other and had no interest in having an open relationship. There just came a time where that just didn't feel like it was good enough for me. I felt as though I was settling into a relationship where we were just coexisting. What was lacking was true love. I realized this when I started dating my current boyfriend. I fell in love with him and realized it was unlike anything that I had ever felt. Every other relationship I had prior seemed so immature compared to this. I was so happy in a relationship where we were both committed and completely in love.  In these type of committed relationships there has to be both love and commitment. It’s almost as if one can’t exist without the other. 

Nov 5th - Nov 11th Discussion #1

I personally don’t think that it is ethical for people to represent themselves inaccurately. Online dating is a choice of dating that is essentially available for adults looking for friendships and even committed romantic relationships. The only downfall to this type of dating is people are able to deceive others by posting different ages, false pictures of themselves, and even false biographies. A person can be whoever they choose in essence if they continue their relationship online. I don’t think that representing yourself inaccurately is fair to those who are online revealing their true self. It doesn't level the playing field and makes it unfair. Deception is present in all interaction but is more like online versus face to face. When you are in person you are unable to lie directly about gender, race, and other physical qualities. Someone who is willing to deceive another will find a way whether in person or online but meeting the person eventually will uncover a lot of truth. 

October 29-November 4 (Discussion #2)

My best friend has to be my roommate Cat. We display acceptance, trust, and closeness within our friendship. Acceptance is the expectation that relies on friends accepting each other including their flaws (Wood 256). Trust is a component within the friendship that involves confidence that others will be dependent and will do what they promise. Closeness is emotional intimacy that grows from time together, shared experiences, and communication. These aspects of a friendship all grow with time. Each of the components is intertwined and functions harmoniously together. Cat and I are very different people but we have accepted each other’s personalities even though it doesn’t replicate our own. We have grown to trust by being there for each other in times of need and sorrow.  Our closeness has developed through years of friendship and time spent doing things or going places with each other. The dynamics in our friendship is exactly how the chapter depicts it including the paragraph about having support for one another

October 26- November 2 (Discussion #1)

The issues raised in the advice forum are a direct reflection of the challenges to friendship presented in the chapter. A lot of the forum spoke of the pressures on friendships with an emphasis on internal pressures. I read a lot about the pressure of friends having diverse communication styles as well as sexual attraction. “Friendships may also be strained by the miscommunication that arise from diverse cultural background” (Wood 264). I read a posting that described a friendship of two friends that are from different cultures. One of them is American and the other is Colombian. The American woman describes her type of communication to be rather sarcastic and a lot of the time, the Colombian man doesn't pick up on it because her culture seldom uses sarcasm as a form of joking. This has caused a pressure throughout their friendship. There is also sexual attraction, “even if there is no sexual activity, sexual undertones may ripple beneath the surface of friendships” (Wood 265). This can stem between any type of friendship including one with a female and male present. Many friendships have to go through this initial awkward phase of sexual tension before they can focus on building a long lasting meaningful friendship. In all these issues can be solved through healthy forms of communication and support for one another.